fartscroll.js: funniest JavaScript code ever

“Everyone farts. And now your web pages can too.“

Check out fartscroll.js in action.

Cobol Tutorial

Just for fun: Cobol tutorial.

To be clear, I don’t ever want to touch Cobol. This is just for the record :)

Programming, Motherfucker!

“We are a community of motherfucking programmers who have been humiliated by software development methodologies for years. We are tired of XP, Scrum, Kanban, Waterfall, Software Craftsmanship (aka XP-Lite) and anything else getting in the way of…Programming, Motherfucker.“

http://programming-motherfucker.com/

_{reddit discussion}

Bing promotes Linux

I sent it to reddit too but those *** have no sense of humour :(

Firefox error message

Err, OK, I guess :)

brute force

“When in doubt, use brute force.” — Ken Thompson

Eh :)

Thank you Adobe

Playing Star Trek background noise with a Linux command

play -n -c1 synth whitenoise lowpass -1 120 lowpass -1 120 lowpass -1 120 gain +14

Even better if you add this to your .bashrc file:

alias engage="play -n -c1 synth whitenoise lowpass -1 120 lowpass -1 120 lowpass -1 120 gain +14"

Multiple versions:

#!/bin/sh
# Engage Warp Drive

# Requires package 'sox'
# http://www.reddit.com/r/linux/comments/n8a2k/commandline_star_trek_engine_noise_comment_from/

# odokemono
# http://www.reddit.com/r/scifi/comments/n7q5x/want_to_pretend_you_are_aboard_the_enterprise_for/c36xkjx
# original
# play -n -c1 synth whitenoise band -n 100 20 band -n 50 20 gain +25  fade h 1 864000 1

# noname-_-
# http://www.reddit.com/r/scifi/comments/n7q5x/want_to_pretend_you_are_aboard_the_enterprise_for/c373gpa
# stereo
# play -c2 -n synth whitenoise band -n 100 24 band -n 300 100 gain +20

# braclayrab
# http://www.reddit.com/r/scifi/comments/n7q5x/want_to_pretend_you_are_aboard_the_enterprise_for/c372pyy
# TNG
# play -n -c1 synth whitenoise band 100 20 compand .3,.8 -1,-10 gain +20
play -n -c1 synth whitenoise lowpass -1 120 lowpass -1 120 lowpass -1 120 gain +14

(via reddit and hup)

2012

is_computer_on()

The following function is from the BeBook, which details the API of the BeOS operating system.

The Be Book - Classes And Methods - The Kernel Kit / System Information:

int32 is_computer_on();

“Returns 1 if the computer is on. If the computer isn’t on, the value returned by this function is undefined.”

_{Found here in a comment.}